Many people will be experiencing painful emotions in the times to come. For some this will manifest as fear and guilt; for others, shame at not being able to meet performance expectations.

Asking these people to “make an effort” or “smile a little” has a name in psychology: surface acting. Very damaging, this request to act “as if” everything was going well creates emotional dissonance and weakens commitment, well-being and motivation.

To imagine that holding back tears is all it takes to be less unhappy is to forget that sincerity is an important source of serenity.

By Adrien Chignard